thank You.
Apparently it doesn't depend on how much I know, for You to bring me through days that I can't see much out of.
I could have made the choice to run away from it. I could have insisted on having a guitar with me for the worship service....to hide behind with. (surprised that the instrument can also be used to hide away with? yes it can.)
I could have excused myself and left right after service, and just pass the youth cell to someone, or some other time.
I could have insisted on playing drums, and hide behind it.
And honestly...I really wanted to. And tried to infact.
But it wasn't what You wanted. Things just happened and led me to the place.
But I still had to make the choice, not to run away.
I don't know why...but it felt useless to try to run away.
And during the worship as I stood there singing "Still" and "With All I Am"....
"hide me now...under Your wings..
cover me, within Your mighty hands..
when the oceans rise...
Jesus I believe...I belong to You..."
I sensed a nudging in my heart. It seemed to be a similar nudging that Jeremy Camp had...and his own testimony came to my mind as I stood in Your presence in my brokeness....it seems...
...You wants me to stand, and praise and honor Him. To choose to turn my tear-stained face to You, to lift my weary hands to You, to lay my disappointed heart before You...because...
..because You are still alive. Because You still reign. Because You still holds everything in Your hands. Because You are still worthy. Because nothing of You have changed. Because You....still love.
So...let me stay with You through this period. If I stand, if I kneel, if I fall and just curl up like a feotus helplessly before You, let it be in Your presence. Draw me to the posture You want me in...
that would find me the rest and restoration in You.
Help me to wait, patiently.
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[Mountain of God] - Third Day, "Wherever You Are"
I thought that I was all alone
Broken and afraid
But You were there with me
Yes, You were there with me
And I didn't even know
That I had lost my way
But You were there with me
Yes, You were there with me
'Til You opened up my eyes
I never knew
That I couldn't ever make it
Without You
Even though the journey's long
And I know the road is hard
Well, the One who's gone before me
He will help me carry on
After all that I've been through
Now I realize the truth
That I must go through the valley
To stand upon the mountain of God
As I travel on the road
That you have lead me down
You are here with me
Yes, You are here with me
I have need for nothing more
Oh, now that I have found
That you have lead me down
Yes, You are here with me
I confess from time to time
I lose my way
But You are always there
To bring me back again
Sometimes I think of where it is I've come from
And the things I've left behind
But of all I've had, what I possessed
Nothing can quite compare
With what's infront of me
With what's infront of me
Even though the journey's long
And I know the road is hard
Well, the One who's gone before me
He will help me carry on
After all that I've been through
Now I realize the truth
That I must go through the valley
To stand upon the mountain
Yes I must go through the valley
To stand upon the mountain
Yes I must go through the valley
To stand upon the mountain
I thought that I was all alone
Broken and afraid
But You are here with me
Yes, You are here with me
To stand upon the mountain
Yes I must go through the valley
To stand upon the mountain
Yes I must go through the valley
To stand upon the mountain
I thought that I was all alone
Broken and afraid
But You are here with me
Yes, You are here with me
We've all had those mountaintop experiences.
You feel so close to God.
You can see for miles.Vision galore.
Then life happens, the valley, the struggles.
We often think that the valley is a consequence for the sin of our life.
But at times, maybe it's just our life.
We're all promised struggle.
We all experience suffering.
The hope that we have is wonderfully expressed in this song.
'You were there with me.'
We don't have to go through the inevitable trials of life on our own
- Tai Anderson (Third Day)